I was holding Ella in my arms. 
We were among a throng of excited and loud high school graduates.
We’d already sat together through the ceremony. Ella went from my lap to mom’s, over to grandpa, over to grandma, and back to me.
When the ceremony finally finished, we were flushed outside with a mob of exciting 18 year olds.
Outside the auditorium we both grew weary. I sensed Ella’s growing unease. The stimulation, noise and energy was too much now.
Ella spoke up, and whispered a babble. But she didn’t have to. I could read her mind, “Let’s head for the shade of those two trees across the long field” she thought.
Indeed, there were two trees whose shade would provide welcome comfort. The trek was the full length of a football field. We both knew there would be peace under the canopy of those two trees that had grown together.
We both looked with a longing.
But I was as weary as she was. The sun was growing higher and hotter. Yet, standing idly amidst the chaos was not an option either.
We knew it would be quieter there. Better to watch from a distance. We could rest and play quietly while mom gave hugs, took pictures and congratulated her brother.
‘But Daddy,” she thought, “It looks like a long way to travel.”
I looked again but this time through her squinting eyes.
It was bright.
That sun was hot.
She was intimidated, unsure and looked back to me.
To Ella, that field was an absolute prairie, a long haul. To Ella, that grass raced onward far beyond what she could fathom.
She waited for me to decide.
She wasn’t sure if it could be done. Her imagination was not yet developed to understand the length of not only distance, but time.
Her eyes glazed over as she stared toward the unmeasurable distance, and for the first time ever, I watched her in-decision. Or at least this is how I imagined my little girl would someday feel when faced with in-decision.
To take that first step is a commitment, but to go all the way is a promise.
So I asked myself as a parent, and as a father, What does such a gaze mean? What would I tell my child?
I had an eerie feeling that this wouldn’t be the last time, that there’d be so many more gazes like this to come.
Then in an instant I had this thought dream–
It was the angel that guarded Ella’s soul. She fluttered radiantly and reflected the sun’s rays in a kaleidescope as she descended down to ask me this one important question.
The angel asked, ”How far can you walk Daddy?”
That question begged for an even bigger question.
That’s the kind of question that can only be answered with the promise of a life long commitment. And it starts with waking ready — everyday.
As far as needed Ella, I thought, as far as needed.
I walked. The first step was a commitment. The journey was my promise. And as I walked, I told her about how it feels to be standing at the foot of your mountain of dreams. With each step, I told her nothing is as hard as it seems.
We made it!
What would you tell your child?
My Dad used to tell me towards the end of his life that “I love you no matter what!” I tell my wife, kids, family and friends the same thing…. no matter what decision they make I support you on your path… I will continue to live my life this way. I will tell my children always… “I love you no matter what!
@John — Thanks man. Great practice you’re in of telling your children that and providing that life-long message. That’s the kind of positive self-talk they’ll be repeating in their heads when they really need to hear themselves say it. Difference maker.
Always appreciate your comments here. Thanks.
What a powerful metaphor for the rest of your lives together. It is these special moments that you share with Ella that she will draw upon for strength later in her life. She may not always be able to visualize all of the details, but they will be there-imprinted in her soul forever
Love,
Rana
@Rana — I agree. It’s the imprint. Thanks for the comment.
I love that story Eric. I remember hearing an interview with a world-record holder long distance swimmer. She was asked how she manages to swim such long distances and her answer was to focus on each stroke and make it the best it can be. If we give each step our full effort and keep a vision of our destination, then we will surely reach our goals.
Have a wonderful Father’s Day!
warm wishes,
Cindy
@John Carroll–
)
I have always told my children the same thing, “I love you no matter what.” My grand children are also getting that message from me. In fact my 5 year old grand daughter and I were talking about the importance of being more beautiful on the inside than the outside (she is often told how pretty she is) and she said, “You would love me even if I was ugly. You would love me even if I broke into someone’s house and stole something, because you would love me no matter what.” So she’s gotten the message. Just make sure to lock your doors if she’s around.
I wished I could write like you. When my kids were young we always ended our conversation with I love you. No matter if it was correction or direction. I got a call today on Fathers day. I was not home and this was the message i love you dad I really love you. That made my day and my life.
Hi Eric!
Happy Father’s Day! Glad I got your email today and clicked on the link… you Sir are a gifted writer! This is so beautiful! And that photo towards the end? Oh, that just stole my heart!
Before I tell you what I would tell Garrett, I have to tell you first “You are one amazing Dad!” Ella is soooo blessed to have a Dad like you!
Now, what would I tell Garrett when he gives me that “gaze”? I will tell him to trust that there is a plan and we already have all the pieces in place to succeed… that we have been created with success in our DNA and all we need to do is acknowledge that and believe it with all our hearts and make the first move, no matter how uncertain it is…
Thank goodness, I would like to say we’ve done a pretty decent job since Garrett is rather decisive… from kids he hangs out with, to his choice of movies, books, entertainment and yes even clothes! He’s 8 years old but he’s been that way since he was a few weeks old when he refused to wear pajamas with footies that I had to cut all of the footies off!
Anyway, just wanted to say “kudos” to such a beautiful post…I miss you my Friend!
Big Hugs!
Emma
Eric,
I have to admit that I found it really neat that my subscription to your other blog led me here. I like how you led me here, and I like even more that I am nearly moved to tears. The first step is commitment, and the journey is the promise. This is true in intimate relationships (phileo, eros, and agape) and it’s true in life. It’s also so true in business. The longer I do this, the more I realize that I am fulfilling one of life’s highest callings…that business is not just about my earning ability. It is about serving others.
What higher way to serve is there than when you teach your child the beauty of faith…that faith is not based on an unrealistic set of ideals but rather on time-tested wisdom that certain actions always leads to certain, specific results? What higher work is there than to sell to our best customer, knowing that that which we offer is invaluable? What more valuable customer can there ever be in life than our own progeny?
Eric, I am so honored to be a subscriber to what you write. (When I have just a little more extra to spend, I will be purchasing whatever it is that you offer.
Right now, I am working to recoup hubby’s investment. *giggle*)
Thank you so much for sharing, and I will be sure to share with others what I learn here. You are a resource simply because you are alive.
Bless you and all that is yours by grace,
Christi Johnson