Home Birth Advocacy

A Guide to Home Birth for First Time Moms

28 Comments 15 August 2010

How can a first time mother give birth at home?

So much about pregnancy, labor and birth is unknown to a first time mom.

There are so many questions, curiosities and worries.

Like, “How will I know when contractions are really starting?” or “Will I know how or when to push?”

And those are just the part about the birth.

What about after? What about nursing? What about the first night? Wouldn’t it be easier if there was an instruction manual, or even better, qualified staff to answer these questions for you?

Of course it would! But the journey is full of learning, self-discovery and can be a lot of fun!

Preparing for labor and birth is well worth it. Even though the actually feeling of contractions cannot be defined and varies from woman to woman, understanding the process of birth can answer a lot of questions.

For women planning a home birth during their first pregnancy, questions are coupled with dream-like visions of candles and bath water, a birth ball and their own bed to sleep in the night they give birth.

That scene may sound crazy to some women. Actually, to the majority.

To women considering home birth however, it is hospital births that seem odd. Home seems more natural.

It isn’t always perfectly black and white. Sometimes women are interested in home birth but something is holding them back. In this article, I’d like to offer a few tidbits of advice to help prepare a woman for home birth as a first time mom.

In the United States, birth is more often regarded with fear than trust and relaxation.

Replacing fear with trust is the first step for a new mom to feel comfortable with home birth.

What do I mean when I say,
“replace fear with trust?”

There are several ways to learn how to trust the process of birth.

One of the best things to do is read about the statistics of home birth vs. hospital birth.

Research from around the world shows that planned home birth with an experienced professional (a midwife) is as safe as hospital birth.

That is only the first line as part of a popular pro-home birth slogan. Here is the full sentence:

“Planned home birth with an experienced professional is as safe *if not safer, if considering the rate of unnecessary medical interventions* as hospital birth.

Take a minute to digest that. Really think about it.

Home birth is as safe as hospital birth, if not safer when considering the rate of unnecessary (dangerous) medical interventions.

Studies on home birth are showing that the outcomes of birth are better for mom and baby when less medical intervention is introduced. By medical intervention I mean, cesarean section, the use of forceps or vacuum to assist delivery, labor induction and/or augmentation, and continual fetal heart monitoring.

Another way to discover the uniquely peaceful qualities of home birth is talking with women who have given birth at home before.

This is just as powerful, if not more so, than reading stats! Home birth mamas are eager to share their stories. You can find a lot of home birth stories on this site and hook up with plenty of home birth moms on BBH Facebook.

Once a woman has read through and believes the benefits of home birth outweigh the risks, the emotional battle is usually won.

That is where trust replaces fear.

The next possible emotional challenge is discussing, or not discussing, plans to give birth at home with family and friends.

Some women are perfectly comfortable shouting loud and proud, while others may keep the news to themselves and their significant other.

There is no rule book to follow on this one – it’s up to your personality, your personal relationships and preference.

Here are a few affirmations or mantras to help you trust birth:

  • Trust home birth is safe
  • Trust your body knows what to do, even when it doesn’t know
  • Trust that your midwife is a capable, caring and experienced professional
  • Trust you are strong and can confront challenges with bravery
  • Trust the gigantic power that is birth and it’s place, meaning and purpose in the world
  • Trust your body knows what to do when your mind does not

Above all else, trust your gut!

**

Did you give birth at home to your first child?

Share your experience and advice with other moms who might be reading this post!

Your Comments

28 Comments so far

  1. Erin says:

    THANK YOU FOR WRITING THIS!!!!! I know all caps is shouting, but I just had to.

    I’m not going to have my first child for at least 4 more years, but have been researching birth options now that all my friends are having babies. I’ve been feeling quite unusual since many of the articles are written by moms whose first births were in hospital and I don’t want that experience myself.

    If you can, please include more stories from women who choose home birth for their first birth, both because I’d love to hear from people in that scenario as well as help in gathering fodder for my DH to read when we get to that point in life (home birth, well birth in general, scares him I think).

  2. Leah S says:

    I’m a first time mom that gave birth at home. Honestly, there was no fear associated with the home part. The fear of birth might have been there (tearing, contractions, pooping in the birth pool), but I wasn’t uncomfortable with the prospect of pushing the baby out on my bed – and I did!

    Regarding pushing – I didn’t feel ready until I had been completely dilated for a full hour. I’d give some tentative pushes, but I wasn’t ready. I do love that the midwife didn’t even care, I did my own thing. No purple pushing!

    How will you know you’re in labor? I didn’t realize it might be the real thing until I saw a dime size of blood going to the bathroom. That’s when I decided I better time the contractions. At 3-5 minutes apart and likely no more than 30-45 seconds long, I couldn’t be in labor, right?! But the pain was beginning to be too much and I begged my reluctant husband to call the midwife at 3:45am. Just so she could give me an idea if I was in real labor or not. 30 minutes later, she was checking me… and I was already 5cm! :)

    I bet next time my husband will call the midwife a little more willingly, my labor was 12 hours from the first contraction until my baby was on my chest.

  3. Great article Kaitlyn! I chose a home birth for my first child as well. Honestly, the hospital never made sense to me. When I went for my first prenatal appt. at the hospital the midwife (or “medwife” as I like to call her) laughed in my face when I told her I was looking to have a completely natural birth. So, I decided to look elsewhere. Unfortunately I could not find a birth center nearby so I went onto my next option of having my daughter at home. I spent hours pouring over books, magazines, and websites and was convinced that this was definitely the right choice for our family. Now telling my friends and family was a bit harder. I got asked if I was trying to be a martyr, why on earth would I refuse an epidural,I even was ridiculed in public by some women who knew I was planning a home birth. But I knew in my heart that this was best. When I heard comments I would state statistics or simply say “this is my daughter, my body, and I’ll give birth how I want”. I could go on but you really just have to have faith in yourself, faith in your body, and faith in your baby. Women have been poppin out babies. Since the dawn of time and I know they didn’t have epidurals back then! Society has instilled a fear in women that birth is a medical condition that needs to be managed when very rarely it is that.

    “We have a secret in our culture; its not that birth is painful, its that women are strong.”

    -Laura Stavoe-Harm

    I became a doula because I truly believe in birth. Having my daughter at home where I felt safe and comfortable was the best thing that ever happened to me. I understand home birth is not an option for everyone due to health conditions, insurance, etc. but its truly an amazing experience. If you can do it I would go for it 110%! On the bright side, if this is your first birth then you don’t have any clue as to what labor feels like and therefore will have nothing to compare it to, right?

    Blessings!

    • karen says:

      I just had the epidural question asked of me for the first time this pregnancy (#4). It is kind of odd thinking, how badly do I want to shock this perfect stranger? Tell them I am having my baby as all my others, completely naturally, or tell her that I will be giving birth in a place that doesn’t offer epidurals–my home.

  4. Tabitha says:

    I gave birth at home for my first pregnancy, which was twins as well. Wouldn’t do it any other way. And the truth is every birth is different so you can’t know what to expect EVER.

  5. Liz says:

    Great points! No one can control what will happen to your body during birth, you can only control your environment. Every woman should make sure the place where she gives birth is a place she feels most comfortable and where she is surrounded by people she trusts to carry out her wishes, even when she is incapable of asserting them. For me, a first time Mom, that was at home with a midwife I trusted, not at a hospital with the on-call OB that I had never met!

  6. Cindy says:

    Great post! I found that I really just had to trust my body and know that it was designed to give birth. I never doubted that I’d rather give birth in the comfort of my own home than under the pressures of a hospital with policies and interventions. I think any woman who is questioning hospital birth will never regret birthing outside the hospital. I’ve never met anyone who didn’t love their homebirth even if they did end up transferring to the hospital in an emergency.

  7. Martha says:

    I love what you say about replacing fear with trust. That was exactly the reason I choose a homebirth with my first baby. I fear hospitals. Why would I go some place that scares to begin with? I believed in myself and I found a midwife that I could trust and helped me believe and trust in myself.

  8. Jenny says:

    I loved my homebirth for my first baby! Here is a link to my birth story.

    http://scootietoot.blogspot.com/2010/02/lucys-awesome-hypnobabies-home-birth.html

  9. Yvette Woodhouse says:

    I had planned a homebirth for my first baby, but unfortunately it ended up in an emergency transfer to hospital. However, all was fine and I was really pleased to have laboured at home (especially as it was a 3 day long latent labour!). Didn’t hesitate to have my second baby at home last August and it was the most beautiful experience of my entire life. Just as the midwife said to me when my amazing new, little baby boy was suckling in our big, comfortable bed ‘and that’s how birth is meant to be’! So much more natural. I would recommend it without a doubt!

  10. BerkshireMom says:

    First baby, and subsequent two, were all born at home. It was where I felt comfortable, safe, and in control. Before I got pregnant I began reading extensively and learning as much of what to expect as possible. Never a fan of hospitals, I became even less so after learning more about “routine procedures’, common infections, rules, rules, rules…..My husband wasn’t 100% behind the idea, coming from a family with medical backgrounds. I did NOT want to deliver in the hospital where his sister worked, knowing that somehow she would turn it all into “auntie saves the day and delivers nephew/niece” event. We did not tell anyone of our plans, and there were more than a few sharp inhalations and pursed lips when we announced the arrival of our child and when and where “visiting hours” were! When I became pregnant a second time, there were a few “You’re not going to do THAT again, are you?”‘s. With the third, they knew enough not to even ask.

    My midwives gave me far superior care to the five-minute prenatal exams that I first experienced with an OB. Each visit was about an hour and I had to discuss what I was eating, how I was sleeping, my exercise routine, my worries, my questions, my aches, my moods, my preparations….Things that would have never come up with my OB were talked about, problems and worries were RESOLVED, any concerns were fully addressed. Those visits helped me build a relationship with my midwives. I was able to build my trust in them, and they helped me build my trust in my body and the birth process.

    I figured that my baby and I deserved only the absolute best…and a hospital birth just wasn’t nearly it. Home birth really was.

    • karen says:

      I had my first 3 in a hospital that at least was friendly towards natural birth. unfortunately assisted homebirth was illegal in the state I lived in. Anyways, I know what you are saying about the midwives giving more care to their patients. For my 4th I am planning my first homebirth. I was suprised about the things I learned during this pregnancy. One thing that the midwives definitely do is educate their clients. In the hospital, it seems they want you to know only the minimum so that you are less likely to question them and more likely to just do what they say. I am really looking forward to a birth where I am in control!

  11. My husband and I chose homebirth for our first baby, and are planning one for our second. I resonated with the post on this blog a few months ago about the “you’re so brave” comment homebirth mamas often hear, because I knew that going to the hospital and trying to prevent unnecessary interventions would have been like going into battle, while home was–both evidentially and emotionally–the calm, simple, right place to be for us. Sometimes when I hear the war stories from women who did start out with a hospital birth, I feel as though I took the easy way out! And it’s not as though the birth was easy or painless–it is the hardest thing I have ever done–but it was a journey instead of a fight, because everyone present was in full support of my ability and our health. While it was an inexpressibly hard journey, the trust I felt from and for the people around me gave me an empowering sense of safety and trust in my body. Being on my own turf and being cared for by women who completely supported my desire for a non-interventive birth allowed me to focus on doing my work and making my journey, rather than worrying about what was going to be done to me and my baby.

    In short, I hurt and I worked and I moaned and I asked why it hurt so much, but I was never afraid, which seems a rare gift in the midst of our cultural perceptions of birth.

  12. Lisa says:

    I was really hesitant about having a homebirth for my first baby, and my husband was set against it. He said, “We can have the next baby at home if everything goes well this time.” But as I researched more and more, I realized that I was never going to feel safe or comfortable or get the respect I needed in a hospital. I toured almost all the hospitals in my city, driving tour guides crazy and asking lots of questions. Finally, I decided that it wasn’t good enough for me to wait to have my BEST birth with my next child. It wasn’t fair for THIS child–she deserved the best I could offer her. She would only be born once, and I wanted her to have the best experience possible. Plus, this was my ONLY chance to give birth for the first time–this was the only time I would become a mother. This experience was going to shape my beliefs and expectations about myself as a mom for the rest of my life. And so I decided to homebirth. I gave my husband a long list of studies to read, and by the time he’d finished he was totally on board with me. And in February of 2008, my daughter was born after 36 hours of labor. My labor was slow and gentle, and I’m sure if I’d been in the hospital I would have been pressured for interventions–and very likely ended with a c-section–because I progressed so slowly. Instead I had the most beautiful, peaceful experience imaginable. I can honestly say that labor was barely painful for me–only slightly uncomfortable at times, and it was so much FUN that I said afterwards I wish I could do that once a month instead of having my period! I LOVED giving birth.

    But the best part about having a homebirth for my first baby was how it impacted my confidence as a first-time mother. Labor was hard work, but I never had any doubt that *I* had done it. Nobody had done it for me. And if I had done, well, I could do anything. What a wonderful mindset to begin motherhood with. Breastfeeding? Easy. Waking every hour with my fussy newborn? Not a problem. Caring for a high-needs baby who cried every second that she wasn’t on my breast? No worries! I just had 36 hours of natural labor and gave birth with no drugs or interventions; I can do ANYTHING! :) Giving birth at home gave me the trust in my body and the utter confidence in my instincts that every new mom desperately needs. Nothing will teach you to parent like a deep love for your child (which is really boosted by those natural birth hormones!) combined with a deep confidence in your own instincts. Now my daughter is halfway through the “terrible twos”, and she’s the loveliest, easiest toddler in the world. And I honestly believe that part of the reason parenting her has felt so easy for me, even now, because I birthed her naturally and peacefully at home. Having a good birth with your first child sets you up for success in parenting in the moment when you first become a parent. That’s truly wonderful.

  13. Christy says:

    I homebirthed for both my first and second children and am planning another for my third and last child.
    I learned about homebirth up in Canada while volunteering as a doula for young and underprivileged mothers. After seeing how they and I (as well as the nursing staff at times) were treated by the doctors, I was at times appalled. I knew I did not want my own birth to be a big battle between an arrogrant ob and hospital policy versus myself and what I wanted for my baby.
    I chose homebirth with a midwifery group, and had a wonderful experience. The midwives were able to address my every concern, and even “flipped” my breech-at-37-weeks first daughter, who would have ended up as a C-section otherwise.
    When I finally went into labor 7 days after my due date, I was ready, relaxed, and never felt a moment of fear. And I was surprised that the contraction never got as bad as people said they would. In fact, by the time I finally agreed to call the midwife and she arrived, I was at 10 cms! I remember sitting up in bed and saying, “Really? I’m done! What do I do now? Do I push?”
    Immediately after that sentence came out of my mouth, the pushing contrax started. About 1/2 hr later, my daughter was born gently into water in a kiddie pool in our living room and placed on my chest.
    It could not have been a better birth, and I am so thankful that my first experience was so wonderful. I lament hearing the stories from my friends of disappointing hospital births, but many of them have chosen homebirths for their second children.
    My husband calls me the Midwife Missionary. ;) I just think midwives are the best-kept secret. Good luck all you first-time homebirthers. I can tell you for a fact, I never heard a first-time homebirther say she regretted her decision– only the opposite.

  14. thespai says:

    I echo everything people have said here. I read, researched, feared the hospital, did not fear my home, loved my midwives, worked to get my head ready by reading positive birth stories — INA MAY GASKIN, GUIDE TO CHILDBIRTH (not shouting, it’s just very important to surround oneself with positive to counter all the negative in our society around birth).

    I agree with whoever said you never know what kind of birth you are going to have. All you can do is trust and ***know*** that you and your body are ridiculously stronger and wiser than you can ever imagine.

    In the end, I had 2.5 days of warmup (like PMS for some, strong cramps), 3 hrs of active labor (moaned, swayed, used visualizations like being in a river with strong water washing over me and riding the crest of a wave with all my focus on staying on the front of that rest and positive affirmations/mantras like “Open, Release and I’m going to get huge”), and 45 min of pushing in a birth tub.

    I honestly, truly (though so many tell me I lie, as if they know and were there in my body) did not have a painful labor. The hardest part was pushing because if I had any fear at all it was of tearing, but I told my midwives this and had, as I said, worked hard to know myself and my fears. I knew I could take my time and push and back off as I needed. My midwives supported me and told me when I really needed to push for real and get my sweet baby girl out. I trusted my baby and my midwives completely and followed their instructions. Indeed, it was the ***only*** thing they ever told me to do during the entire labor. Everything was done following my lead, and, as I was following my baby and my body, I felt complete trust and was 100% able to release using my visualizations and mantras.

    I had 0 vaginal exams during the entire pregnancy and labor, 0 ultra sounds and 1 doctor visit to my would be backup doctor in the case of a non-medical emergency. He was awesomely supportive of homebirth and of natural childbirth — so there you go. There *are* doctors who have done the research and are not afraid or greedy and will say the truth about birth and women’s bodies. And it’s good they exist because sometimes after laboring as much as possible at home (or maybe not at all) you and your midwife will experience something that tells you to go to the hospital to get the supports they have there. If that should happen, you will have the support you need as you need it, rather than in spite of the fact that you don’t need it. Ironically, two of my three midwives had c-sections after long labors at home — one baby had a 12 in cord (not enough to get out), and the other had turned breech last minute. They gave the babies all the benefit of those hormones and that process, though, which makes a difference.

    My advice?
    First, be clear and communicative about the birth that you envision for yourself.
    1. Face your fears and judgments and doubts before the birth. In the end it’s just you and your head and heart and body and baby. what you believe matters. what you think and say matters. I liked the book “Birthing From Within” and did a few drawings with pastels (though I am no artist by any means, nor comfortable drawing) that told me some things I had not thought about consciously.
    2. Think about the support you need and want and how you want it. For example, my husband knew to just stick the glass of coconut water with the straw in my face/mouth rather than ask me in words and get me out of my trance. He knew because we read and talked about the kind of environment that is conducive to birth. watching animals and humans, most women want a darkened room, want to move around, feel relief from warm water, might need hydration, feel least encumbered naked, and so forth. He put the candles on, got the tub ready, held me while i swayed, poured water on my back during the pushing and had 100% confidence in me and my body during pregnancy and labor.
    3. Tell people and yourself what they need to know and hear. I didn’t know what I would want in the moment. I fantasized that I would have all this love and attention from my support — someone massaging me, holding me up, stroking my hair, feeding me, encouraging me with words. For all I knew, though, I would want to be alone and kick everyone out. it ended up that i did want to go completely inward and listen to my body and the baby and I didn’t want to talk or hear anyone talk, but I didn’t have to say that because everyone just watched what I was doing and listened. they could hear my moans intensify, knew I hadn’t drank anything in a while, heard me ask if I was doing the right thing — a plea for confirmation that I was on the right track. I have never been so in tune with another being or myself or felt that others were so in tune with me.

    Second, find a good midwife that:
    1. Knows her stuff — pregnancy and birth supports like yoga, chiropractic and acupuncture make a difference. your state laws might be complicated. you might want to be reimbursed or covered through insurance.
    2. Is 100% supportive in a way that works for you — everyone needs something different. Some women need a pushy person who tells them flat out to stop whining because they can do this, some need a gentle coaxing.

    Birth is not a medical event nor a medical emergency.
    A woman is not a machine.
    A baby is not an object.

    Birth, women’s bodies and babies are 100% natural, normal and trustworthy. Everything is as it should be. Every woman and baby deserves the chance to experience a natural birth.

  15. Melissa says:

    My first was at home (I’m preggo again and planning another home birth) and I had the best experience. I echo other thoughts here about fearing tears, contractions and pooping while pushing. But those are all natural fears regardless of where you have the baby. Here’s what I’ve learned: tears are significantly reduced (I had none with an 8lb baby) because midwifes let your body take it’s time and do perineum massage and stretching as you labor. Contractions early on are not bad – they are completely manageable. As you get closer to delivery and when you think you can’t take it anymore, you’re in transition and next you’ll be pushing. Note that if you are in transition, it’s too late for epidural anyway. And when you get to the pushing, you don’t feel the full contractions because you are pushing through them. I really liked pushing because I didn’t feel the contractions AND I was working to get the baby out so I felt in control and productive. Finally, forget about the poop. You can’t control it either way, you’re so focused on everything else you don’t even know if you do or not (I still don’t know and haven’t asked) and if you do no one calls attention to it, the midwife simply takes care of it. And I promise you, in the throws of labor you gave no modesty anyway!

    My best suggestion for those considering home birth, particularly for their first, is to take a Bradley Childbirh class. It prepares you physically, emotionally and mentally. Plus, there are very often other home birthers in your class you can connect with. That Bradley class was the best home birth prep (besides our midwife of course) my husband and I did!

  16. Jennifer M says:

    I birthed my first child at home. Making that decision was truly a journey. I started out interested in the idea but was quickly discouraged by my mother and husband. I figured I could have my natural birth in the hospital this first time and possibly consider homebirth the next time. After all, I couldn’t really know what birth would be like this first time, right? (Though I must now say, we never really know exactly, and being in the hospital doesn’t change that. In fact being in the hospital can sometimes be even more unpredictable!)

    I read throughout my pregnancy and took natural childbirth classes. I started to realize that my birth preferences were incompatible with the hospital where I was planning to give birth. I didn’t want my labor and birth to be a constant battle, and I was learning that homebirth could actually be a safer choice for my personal circumstances.

    I remember the moment that I decided to have a homebirth. I was riding back from a fellow pregnant friend’s baby shower with her and her sister. They were discussing how they could never have a homebirth like a couple of the other ladies that had been at the shower and how they didn’t really understand why those ladies had chosen homebirth. I suddenly realized how defensive I felt for those ladies mentioned–I realized their reasons for choosing homebirth and I agreed with them! In that moment I realized I did NOT want a hospital birth. I wanted a homebirth like those other ladies!

    When I got home I told my husband about what had happened in the car and in my heart. After the childbirth classes and all of the discussions we had had by that point he was very supportive. At 32 weeks into my pregnancy, we hired a homebirth midwife.

    I am SO glad we chose a homebirth for my first birth. It was not at all “textbook” and I feel confident that it would have been a train wreck in the hospital. It could have easily ended in a c-section, which would have affected every future birth. Or the experience could have left me afraid or unable to trust the birth process and my body again.

    As it was, my first birth gave me the confidence that my body was indeed capable of accomplishing this amazing feat of giving birth, even under minor deviations from “normal”. I walked away empowered and able to look back on my experience with joy. I felt that I had given my baby the best start in life, and I was so grateful that I’d been able to have such a positive experience in the process.

    I now have four children, all of which were born at home.

  17. MichelleD says:

    I too gave birth to my first at home with a midwife and yes, fear was behind that decision. My fear was for hospitals and my previous experiences there (not good), their “routines” for birthing moms (didn’t want) and being subjected to a possible “on-call OB” whom I never met (as Liz wrote). My labour was quick, but there was no other place I’d rather be. All along I knew I was going to be able to do it.

    We didn’t tell anyone of our plans because when people found out I had a midwife, they already made their comments and told me not to have the baby at home (particularly my Mother-in-law). When I have a second one, I’ll be at home again. :)

  18. Thank you for this warm, refreshing and positive outlook on home birth. I’m preparing for my first pregnancy right now but we already know that we’ll be giving birth at home. I’m really grateful to have your website as an additional resource to give my clients and for inspiration for my own birth :)

  19. Antje says:

    When I asked a close friend of my husbands how her home birth went, she simply replied ‘manageable’. That was all I needed to be convinced that I could do it. My husband jumped on board with the support and enthusiasms that I know not every Mother To Be is fortunate enough to have. As a victim of sexual abuse, he knew I needed the birth to be as intimate as possible. It wasn’t easy to share that my biggest fear was exposure but only a drugged up me could have survived the emotional stress of being in a hospital.
    I found two amazing midwives whom I can’t thank enough and experienced a birth that was truly empowering me to be proud of my body. A feeling that I was not allowed to have. The contractions were painful but ‘manageable’ and there was a moment in time of transition were I simply declared that I understand women who want to have medications. Needless to say my beautiful daughter was born 15 minutes later while on my hands and knees because her shoulder got stuck behind my pubic bone which let to tearing but I wouldn’t change anything for how amazing I felt having my newborn on my chest with no one intervening. No shots to be given, no eye drops and no ‘sugar’ water. No one ‘helping’ you when all you need is time and love!
    I was called a Hippie who’s just out to be different. Quite frankly words and misconceptions shouldn’t stop any first time Mama’s. It’s hard to advocate natural birthing when women want to be ignorant in a world where it’s more important how you look during birth than how you feel. A friend after a c-section is so glad she doesn’t have to go through labor pains with her second one which will be a definate scheduled c-section but how in the world anyone can justify ripping a potential premature baby out of it’s womb and placing it into the hands of strangers for at least 2 hours, is beyond me. Far far beyond me. The confidence my little one has from the moment she was born amazes and prides me.
    Anyhow my second one is due in 6 weeks and I hope and pray that no medical emergency will have me end up in a hospital. I envision just the right amount of pain followed by an awful lot of joy, intimacy and love that will eradicate especially the pain of not being covered by insurance for a home birth. I won’t know what to expect until I cross that bridge but what I do know for a fact is that there is no place I’d rather be than home!

  20. Sara says:

    Thank you so much for this AMAZING blog post! My amazingly supportive husband and I are trying to conceive our first child. His mom had ten children and 5 of those were born at home with midwives. I thought she was crazy when I found that out! lol

    Then, I watched The Business of Being Born, and prayed a lot about having a home birth and God completely changed my heart! I have talked with several women that have experienced both a hospital birth and a home birth, and every single one of them has just glowed when talking about their home birth(s). I’m so grateful for all the amazing information here, and I’ll probably eventually post a link to this site from my blog!

  21. Jessica says:

    I am 22 weeks pregnant with baby number one. I have been dreaming of a home birth for a few years. I have read every book by Ina May Gaskin and many others in preparation for this event. I am not at all scared. I know my body is totally capable of birthing my baby. I plan to labor in water and hopefully birth in the pool as well. I can’t wait to experience all labor and birth has to bring at me. It’s going to be amazing!!!

    Hospitals are the scary place not home!!!

  22. Lyndi says:

    I am currently a ticking time bomb! Five days passed my due day and contently bouncing on my exercise ball. I am planning a homebirth with an amazing midwife. This is my first pregnancy, and beyond the birth my experience with having a midwife as a prenatal care giver has been nothing short of amazing. The education and support alone takes the fear out of the experience and indeed creates trust. I am excited, well even more so now that I am past my “guess date” for that moment I get to call my midwife because it’s time! I have been quite surprised on how many people responded negatively to my choice to go with a midwife and have a homebirth. More than fear, the social pressure is tough. Even my family has been tough to reassure. The remedy is inviting them to midwife appointments, showing them the Business of Being born video and keep everyone updated through blog posts. And even in the event that I do even up being part of my midwife’s 4% transfer rate, I know that she will be by my side as an advocate and engaging with doctors she has built up a strong relationship with.


Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. BBH Vlog #5: Home Birth Comment Queens | Bring Birth Home - August 18, 2010

    [...] message includes two recent blog posts I’ve written lately – A Guide to Home Birth for First Time Moms and Top Ten Reasons Why Home Birth Results in a Better Birth Experience Than Hospital [...]

  2. Navigating the BBH Blog - A Road Map | Bring Birth Home - November 30, 2010

    [...] A Guide to Home Birth for First Time Moms [...]

  3. One Hundred Sixty Five Reasons to Birth at Home – The Peaceful Birth Project - June 12, 2012

    [...] A Guide to Home Birth for First Time Moms -  Replacing fear with trust is the first step for a new mom to feel comfortable with home birth ~ Bring Birth Home [...]

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