This post is dedicated to every single birthing woman out there, no matter where or how you gave birth. While I do stress natural birth in this article, I understand that any way you bring a baby into the world is hard work, and you should be proud of yourself for the achievement.
Having a natural birth is something I set out to achieve.
I did it for me, and I did it for my daughter. I did it for no one else.
I didn’t give birth naturally because I had anything to prove to anyone else. But I did have something to prove to myself.
I didn’t do it to show everyone how strong I was, but I was very surprised to discover my own strength.
“No is going to give you a medal for giving birth naturally.”
When I hear that statement, I feel incredibly sad for the person saying it.
When did they lose their power? When did they learn to feel so powerless that speaking that way to another human being became acceptable?
For those of you who had have this said to you, remember that people speak in projection. She was talking about herself, her own experience and what she has learned about birth.
It has nothing to do with you.
Just as important to remember, if not more-so, is actually the reverse is true.
You DO get a medal for giving birth naturally!
We get medals for running marathons. BIRTH IS A MARATHON!
The pride you feel from going through the experience of natural birth will live inside you for a lifetime. Your strength and confidence in yourself will only continue to grow.
You award yourself that medal when you choose to believe there is nothing wrong with being proud of yourself for accomplishing a positive and empowering birth experience!
No, you are not better or stronger than the next woman.
No, you do not condemn her for birthing differently than you did.
That’s not what it means to be proud. Being proud of yourself has nothing to do with other people (just as how you choose to birth has nothing to do with other people).
Hold your head high honey.
But we don’t always hold our heads high, do we?
It’s not always easy. Positive birth stories are not the norm in our society and we literally cater to the horror stories that so many women feel compelled to share again and again. Not that I blame them for wanting to talk about it!
But there also needs to be a space created for sharing the positive stories. You prepared for birth -literally studied it – learned about your options, chose the location and had a rewarding outcome.
You have nothing to be ashamed of.
Do not cower. Do not stop talking about how beautiful your birth was.
Of course there is a line, and therefore naturally a code of conduct we should all adhere to when discussing birth. It’s a very sensitive topic.
This is why it is imperative to understand and truly believe that you are no better for birthing naturally.
We have b.s. detectors for that.
Put your shoulders back and down and hold your head high.
You will never know what kind of response you’re going to get for sharing your plans to give birth naturally or sharing a beautiful birth story.
But for those of you who have accomplished a natural birth, you do know that you’re strong. You’ve proven that to yourself already.