I Am An Author!
I printed the first copy of my ebook yesterday. Whoot, whoot!
A little back story about the writing of this book:
I wrote the 9 Steps to Home Birth Prep email newsletter just over two years ago as part of the creation of this site.
The newsletter was free to receive, and since it’s inception, over 750 people planning a home birth have been helped by it’s content.
Early this Spring, I decided to transform the articles of my newsletter into an eBook.
I wanted to make it even more accessible to families. An all-in-one home birth preparation package that women could read on their Kindle before bed or share easy access information with their parents.
So I began the process of turning the 9 Steps inside out. I shook it upside down and watched all the words tumble. What a mess!
Then I picked up all the pieces, rearranged them, tossed out a bunch, added a ton, and adding it all together again. It took me four months.
I’d say 95% of the content is brand spankin’ new.
I’d learned so much since I wrote the original series. Heck, I’d had another home birth since then – and it was so much different than my first!
Now begins the process of editing. Red pen to paper. All 12,000+ words. It’s going to be awesome, thanks to a few stellar editing volunteers (I have read it so many times by now I can practically recite it).
The 9 Steps to Home Birth Prep eBook should be ready for the public the first week of June!
Home Birth Advocacy, Pregnancy
0 CommentsAttachment Parenting Is a Way of Life
Attachment Parenting, often referred to as AP, is considered by many to be a parenting style.
I think of it as a lifestyle. It’s aligned with the way I live my whole life.
Attachment parenting is a way of mothering that nurtures my children. The daily practice of being an AP parent feels most natural to me.
While we’re talking definition, here it is:
Attachment parenting is a term coined by William Sears, meaning, “Attachment parenting is a parenting philosophy based on the principles of the attachment theory in developmental psychology. According to attachment theory, the child forms a strong emotional bond with caregivers during childhood with lifelong consequences. Sensitive and emotionally available parenting helps the child to form a secure attachment style which fosters a child’s socio-emotional development and well being.”
There are a few public figures that have normalized attachment parenting recently.
Mayim Bailik, wrote a book called Beyond the Sling, Angelina and Brad practice co-sleeping, Ricki Lake with home birth, Anne Heche uses cloth diapers and Alicia Silverstone considers herself a natural, attachment parenting mama (read her blog, The Kind Life).
I am so grateful that these high profile people have brought kind parenting practices into view.
Most recently, Time published a piece about AP, specificially drawing attention to extended nursing.
And the cover has everybody talking.
This is my response.
What I like about the cover:
All in all, I am glad that Time Magazine is covering the topic of AP. I think more people and children can benefit from this simple way of life. Remember, the definition of attachment parenting is to be sensitive to a child’s emotions and needs.
I’m also thrilled that the cover has started a conversation about extended breastfeeding. The benefits of extended nursing are numerous. As someone who nursed one child until 3, two children for 8 months, and going strong with a 10 month old, I love to see breastfeeding in the news.
Now here’s what I don’t like about this magazine cover:
The title. Pairing ”Are You Mom Enough?” with a photo of a toddler nursing gives the impression that you must practice extended breastfeeding or you’re not mom enough. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Every mom is mom enough, no matter how long she breastfeeds her children, or if she is able to breastfeed at all. Two weeks or two years. Statements like this create a defensive, judgmental environment between women, that separates us instead of bringing us together. That’s the last thing mothers need.
At the same time, who is mom enough? What the heck does that even mean? We all have strengths and weaknesses.
You ARE mom enough.
‘Nuff said.
Okay. Back to attachment parenting.
How I practice attachment parenting.
Attachment parenting means something different to everyone.
I’m proud of the way my partner and I parent our children and hope you are too, with whatever style works for you and your kiddos!
- I bedshare: Lucan and Ella sleep on either side of me in a twin bed. Eric has his own twin bed in the same room. Sometimes I start out in his bed and make my way over to the other when Lucan wakes up.
- I babywear: I prefer to carry my children rather than put them in strollers. My favorite brand is Ergo. Although Ella is old enough to walk, we sometimes put her in the Ergo on our backs during long nature hikes when she gets tuckered out. We have a second carrier for Lucan, who rides on front of my chest.
- I breastfeed: Ella nursed from day one to just over 3. We continued our nursing relationship through my second pregnancy as well as after Lucan was born, (Ella was 2 1/2). I tandem nursed them for 8 months before slowly weaning my daughter.
- I follow my toddler’s lead: I see “acting out” not as a behavioral problem but as an emotional issue that my daughter doesn’t know how to speak with words. My children have never cried it out to sleep. My children have worn/wear cloth diapers.
I want to stress again that I believe each person needs to walk their own parenting path.
Maybe you don’t use cloth diapers, or perhaps your little one prefers sleeping in their crib. That doesn’t mean you’re not an AP parent. It’s not black and white.
#1: What do you think of the Time cover?
#2: How do you, (or don’t you) practice attachment parenting?
7 Comments
A Midwife For Life
This past week, my grandmother gave me a copy of Inspire, a quarterly magazine published by Borgess Hospital.
Grandma Nona & Ella
She thought of me because the issue included an article featuring nurse midwives called, Behind Women For Life; Celebrating the Role of Certified Nurse Midwives.
I visit my Grandma every Thursday with my children. We’ve been very close forever. She supports my efforts to inform families about home birth. She attended my first home birth and watched her first great-grandchild, Ella, be born. We talk about my work at BBH frequently. Love her so much!
I was grateful, and learned a lot from the article! For instance, I had no idea that CNMs provide life-long care to women, from before pregnancy, such as pap-smears, to long after pregnancy, up to menopause.
After reading it, I couldn’t help but feel a bit…envious.
As much as I love my midwife, I’m a bit jealous of the women who are able to form long lasting relationships with their midwives. My home birth midwife is a CPM, and didn’t provide personal care for me after the process of birthing was over. I’ve always been bummed that we couldn’t spend more time together, whether it be a personal or professional relationship.
However, becoming a
Certified Nurse Midwife 
didn’t appeal to our midwife.
She felt like going to nursing school would have gone against her inner constitution. And I totally respect that. Personally, if I were to become a midwife, I’d have a really hard time going to nursing school and immersing myself in the western medicine field.
In an effort to better understand the roles of the different types of midwives, I am going to highlight Certified Nurse Midwives and Certified Professional Midwives. This will help you determine which midwife to hire.
What are the differences between Certified Nurse Midwives and Certified Professional Midwives?
Here’s what all midwives have in common:
All midwives subscribe to and believe in the Midwifery Model of Care, which states…
“The Midwifery Model of Care is based on the fact that pregnancy and birth are normal life events.
The Midwives Model of Care includes:
- monitoring the physical, psychological and social well-being of the mother throughout the childbearing cycle
- providing the mother with individualized education, counseling, and prenatal care, continuous hands-on assistance during labor and delivery, and postpartum support
- minimizing technological interventions and;
- identifying and referring women who require obstetrical attention
The application of this model has been proven to reduce to incidence of birth injury, trauma, and cesarean section.
The Midwives Model of Care definition above is Copyright © 1996-2001, Midwifery Task Force, All Rights Reserved.”
Certified Nurse Midwives, (CNM) provide high-quality care for women of all ages – from expecting to menopause. Nurse Midwives generally work in hospitals, but are not limited to do so unless their agreement states otherwise. CNMs work independently in hospitals and refer high-risk clients to an obstetrician when necessary. CNMs can legally attend home births in some states. One becomes a Nurse Midwife by attending nursing school with an additional midwifery training through Accreditation Commission for Midwifery Education (ACME).
The Certified Professional Midwife, (CPM) credential, issued by NARM (North American Registry of Midwives), is accredited by the National Commission for Certifying Agencies (NCCA), the accrediting body of the Institute for Credentialing Excellence (ICE). CPMs are independent practitioners and assist women in giving birth at home as well as birth centers. Certified Professional Midwives care for women during their childbearing cycle, from pregnancy to postpartum.
In the end, in my opinion, all that really matters is that you hire a midwife! <wink> Make sure you interview as many midwives as possible to decide which midwife will share your values.
Lastly, be sure to check this out! The Midwives Alliance of North America (MANA) has put together some incredible videos about midwives lately.
Watch Every Woman Deserves a Midwife and Midwifery Care: What’s In It For Women? They’ll have more videos coming up, so subscribe to their YouTube channel here: I Am A Midwife YouTube Channel. I give them two thumbs up for quality, professional and informative social media marketing! The birth world needs it!
Now it’s time to hear from you! Was your midwife a CNM or a CPM? (or maybe a direct entry or lay midwife?) Where you happy with the overall care you received? Tell us your story in the comments below.
Photo credits
CMN: http://healthpsych.psy.vanderbilt.edu/Midwifery.htm
CPM: http://narm.org/certification/
Free MOBB Screening! Explore Your Options: Doulas, Birth Centers & C-Sections
Join us for a free live screening of More Business of Being Born, Explore Your Options: Doulas, Birth Centers & C-Sections, on Monday, May 7th 8:00 PM EST.
And stick around after for a live chat with Ricki, Abby and surprise guests!
2 CommentsWhat It Means To Be A Birth Visionary
Today, I watched this video of Karen Brody (see below), and instantly became enamored with how she described the term Birth Visionary.
First she described the birth worker. The birth worker is out there (doing their birth work), and they carry this BIG dream. That dream is the desire for everyone to embrace the notion that birth is normal.
Then she describes the change agent. The change agent is simply the person who makes the commitment to the dream.
Now marry those two together, and you get the birth visionary.
What an eloquent way of communicating what’s already in my heart.
You too?!
Watch the video and tell me what you think.
If you’re not familiar with Karen Brody, let me briefly tell you who she is. Karen is the creator of Birth, The BOLD Movement, and FEAR To FREEDOM Birth. She was a guest on Bring Birth Home T.V. not long ago.
Karen is re-opening her FEAR To FREEDOM Birth program, and kicking it off with a free “Boot Camp For Birth Visionaries” teleclass on Monday, May 7th at 12:00 EST.
You can find all the details, and registration information for the call here: Birth Visionary Boot Camp with Karen Brody.
0 CommentsChild Protective Services Called For Refusing Routine Newborn Medical Procedures
On April 11th, Child Protective Services was called when parents declined routine newborn medical procedures.
Dr. Daniel Cooper had the opportunity to help deliver his son.
Cooper Family
He and his wife Simone had wanted a home birth, but after concerns about the baby could be in distress, decided instead to birth where Dr. Cooper had recently served a two year position as chief of staff, at Mercy Hospital in Folsom.
Although son Ivan was born in good health and doing fine, disputes began immediately, even as to the time of birth.
The family didn’t want eye ointment, brought their own liquid vitamin K and declined to have blood drawn. There were disagreements, but no one was yelling. It wasn’t a heated situation. Simone, who gave birth naturally after a previous cesarean, even refused ibprofren for after birth pains.
President of Mercy Hospital, Don Hudson, said “parents have the right to refuse treatment for themselves or their children. However, health care providers may be obligated to notify the appropriate authorities if refusing treatment places a child’s health in potential danger.”
Then why, after Daniel drove their healthy newborn home was CPS called?
“I am stunned that they could think he was in danger,” said Cooper.
The response has been one of outrage. “How dare they!” and “That’s why you should have your baby at home!”
I did my share of eye rolling too. Home birth does provide exceptional newborn care.
While I agree this wouldn’t have happened had they stayed at home to give birth, when medical attention might be needed, the hospital is the safest place to give birth.
What could have been done differently?
I have an idea: a birth plan.
What if they had written a birth plan and brought it to the hospital, handing one out for everyone on duty that day?
Would they have run into the same situation? If everyone knew their wishes ahead of time, rather than as a game time decision?
It’s a technique we use with our toddler. If she has a dentist appointment or an upcoming party, we tell her about it days beforehand, giving her plenty of time to process the information.
These choices are theirs to make, and no one should pester them, or god forbid go so far as calling Child Protective Services, especially when the newborn is healthy!
I am in no way insinuating that what happened was acceptable.
But I can’t help but wonder, if the couple had proactively communicated their wishes on these routine newborn care procedures - the way any doula, natural childbirth instructor or birth advocate would advise – would they have run into such friction?
Stephanie Dawn, Sacred Birth Mentor, had a more empowering hospital birth than her previous home birth! Why? She says it was because of her birth plan. Everyone in that room knew her wishes and what to expect. No surprises or arguments.
What are your thoughts? Has anyone experienced difference in treatment during hospital births when they had a birth plan vs. no birth plan? I’d love to hear from you on this subject!
5 Comments